Archive for November, 2014

Snoozin' for a bruisin'

Snoozin’ for a bruisin’

Does anyone hold the secret to a good night’s sleep? Please tell me… I’ll pay!*

In my world, I have all the necessities for sleep. Let me see… there’s tiredness, check, a dark quiet room, check, a bed, check, a pillow, check. But despite all these luxury items, when I drag my weary body to bed, I just get into a fight with Robin. Robin is the name of my pillow, they said I needed to name it, in order to build a positive relationship.

Now I should say, I don’t have any real beef with Robin personally and even though we see eye to eye most of the time, we just haven’t bonded. So inevitably, I end up punching Robin, hard, shortly after I lie down each night. Robin is particularly stubborn though, so I usually follow up by thrusting my shoulder forcefully into its guts. The poor thing offers little resistance. “Victory is yours,” right?
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I aint afraid of no ghost

I aint afraid of no ghost


After a recent fit of senselessness, I started visiting a gym to try and ward off “weak as a kitten syndrome.” While it didn’t work, I did find that gyms are fascinating places. When I say fascinating, I mean horrid dens of oppression, full of self-loathing creatures desperate to recapture their youth or at least try to rebuild imperfection. Oh, but gymsters come in other forms too, not everyone is attempting to appease their guilt without attracting undue attention to themselves. Some are just outright exhibitionists or apparently drunk on their own magnificence. In my busy gym sessions, I’ve managed to stay productive through categorising my fellow gymsters, so here’s what I’ve spotted so far.
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